Back in the blog

Hello! I'm finally back! And hasn't a lot happened.

Little O was born on 28 Feb 2012 after 10 hours of labour. I won't go into details (my mother forbids it - I think she's worried I'll put potential new mothers off and jeopardise the future of the human race), but in short: it kind of hurts. I only have myself to blame - there were epidurals and other modern wonders available, but I had
decided that gas and air and a tens machine would be my limit. Next time i'm going for a general anaesthetic, followed by a fortnight in Champneys.

The first few weeks were a little rocky - sponsored by insanity, fuelled by hormones and compounded by sleep deprivation. My mother came out to Abu Dhabi after 2 weeks and picked me up off the floor, dried my tears, brushed me off and suggested I get some sleep. Six hours later and hey presto! I was practically human again.  That all seems like a long time ago now.

Now we're back in the UK with a seven month old boy who crawls and natters and eats and sticks fingers in plug sockets and throws wobblies if not allowed to bang the door handle repeated for hours, laughs every time I say 'boo' or 'toowhit toowhoo' and delights and charms all who meet him (obviously....).

We're still on our extended UK summer holiday, but now the nights are drawing in, it's time to make a decision as to where we plan to live next. We've spent the last few months introducing O to his family in Kent and the North West, but we've got to return to reality sooner or later. At the moment we have shortlisted Glasgow, Edinburgh and Brussels as possible next destinations, but London and the UAE remain possibilities.

Personally I can't wait to get settled. I've already thoroughly researched the rental markets in Scotland and Belgium - an excellent excuse to indulge in some flat hunting porn.

Talking of porn, last night I dreamt that I caught N with two prostitutes, injecting cinnamon. I'm still annoyed with him about it.